let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
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