we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
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