What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
