Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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