I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
cat food counts as protein by the way
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Randomize
