PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I got her a Nickelback box set.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
