Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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