considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
