so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Randomize
