i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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