Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Randomize
