You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
I came so hard my ears popped.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
Randomize
