I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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