Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
Randomize