I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Randomize
