I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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