I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Randomize
