Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
