he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I would ride that face into the sunset
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
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