how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Found half of a five day old piece of pizza behind my dresser. Apparently it was drunkenly set there and got knocked down. It was such a happy reminder of last weekend.
I found a cheeseburger next to my tub once. It's there to shame you, but it always just makes me feel more awesome.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Randomize
