he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
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