Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
So here I am, sexting at work.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize