guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
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