Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Randomize