Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
