you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Randomize
