drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Randomize
