he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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