I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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