sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Randomize
