Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
Randomize
