I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
