Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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