don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
