We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
