Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
Randomize
