YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
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