SEEEEXXX PLEASE
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
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