You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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