Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
my liver is dry heaving
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
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