It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
whose ass print is on the piano?
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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