Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
