I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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