16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Randomize
