And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
