I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
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