How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
