Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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