Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
i came on her dog
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
