If that was your dad, he is hot
That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize