she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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